I finished my first full week at my new job on Friday. Every time I've gone to sleep - whether it's a nap or going down for the night - I dream about my clients.
My best friend's husband, Dan, works at the same place (and actually got me the job) and said that he thought about work all the time when he first got hired, too. I asked him how long it was before he was able to leave work at work and fully come home. He didn't answer.
This job is very new for me; it's a field I always said I would never go into because I couldn't see myself doing well at all. There are many misconceptions about people like my clients and I am working through them, which is fine; but wrapping my head around all the stuff of my job is overwhelming.
It's not unlike when I was a teacher. It consumed my life. I spent all my time outside of work lesson planning and trying to come up with creative ways to help my students learn the material. The night of my first day with my clients I'd scribbled a bunch of notes for ideas of how to work with them in creative ways. Every day this week I have been thinking about worksheets/conversations/outings/activities for my clients. Ach.
I only worry about it because I will throw myself into something so entirely that a) I will get burned out b) I will get offended when I "fail" or things don't go according to plan and c) the work that I'm doing ceases to be about the student/client and more about how successful I am.
So Dan said that it's a good thing I care so much because it shows I'm not taking my job lightly. At the same time, I see myself still trying to calm down and enjoy what's around me. I know I need to remember that the journey is what is important, as cheesy as it sounds. It's ok to slow down and learn this job at my own pace, getting to know my clients and coworkers. And it's ok if I do this for a short time, and it's ok if I do it for a long period of time. Right now, it's a matter of dealing with what is in front of me - when it's in front me.
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